Learning from change

Tuesday, November 17th, 2020


‘I jumped onto the spot on the floor with all the enthusiasm of a child dodging the cracks in the pavement and it suddenly hit me. I had come to a popular place in half-term holidays without overthinking it and was actually feeling quite relaxed. Apart from the opportunity to release my inner child, the spots on the floor, placed at 2m intervals, helped me feel calm and in control. I realised that there were aspects of our new routines that were leading me to feel more confident about going to places I might previously have avoided if I could. What’s more I was building on this to actually get excited about exploring places in this distanced, quieter world that I would never have considered before.’

Counsellors are always curious about changes. When clients are experiencing difficulties it is understandable that those issues dominate their thinking. A counsellor might ask about times when those issues were not present or times that they do not occur. For example, if a client states they argue about everything we might explore what sort of things they are able to work together on or ask about a time when conflict was not present. Apart from refocusing the client’s view to a wider picture, change can help us understand ourselves deeper, such as our needs or defence mechanisms. This can help us find different ways to tackle future issues and build up emotional resilience.

As a society we are living through some of the biggest changes to our lifestyles we have ever experienced If some of those changes feel challenging, take time to reflect and consider what this has taught you about your own needs. Are there times that you do feel comfortable? Have new things come into your life that have been beneficial? Thinking in this way can change a time of change and restriction into a time of exploration and growth.